Jed’s Stag Night

Friday morning and I was heading to work, safe in the knowledge that by the evening I would be almost 190 miles away in Canterbury with my friends from University. Our mission for the weekend was to get Jed, the stag, completely and totally leg-less and give him the time of his pre-marriage life.

Jed is one of a close circle of friends that I first met when I went to University in Exeter almost eight years ago. Jed is one of those people who is fun, the life and soul of any social occasion. He is always up for a good drink and an equally good laugh. Jed met his fiancee Rose at University during his, and my, first year of a three year computer science degree. After University finished they moved to Canterbury where Jed got a job with the University of Kent and Rose began a postgraduate degree at Cambridge University.

James, Dave, Jon and I arrived in Canterbury mid-evening after spending hours crawling around the M25 at the mind numbing speed of 5 miles per hour. Jed had arranged accommodation at the University so we met him outside one of the halls of residence on the edge of campus. Reception was closed so our first stop became the hall bar. The bar was a classic student hangout. Nothing fancy but the basics were in place; a juke box and cheep beer.

After a few pints we checked-in at reception and went up to our rooms. It took me straight back to my years at Exeter. The room was small and basic with a single bed and only just enough space to swing a cat. However it was ensuite with its own shower and toilet.
By the time we got back to the bar the drinking games were in full force. Half hour hands will be the death of me one day. Jed’s brother was the first to fall foul of the 10p challenge when he was sick into a bin after having to down a pint of lager. The bar closed at 11 so we headed down town to see what was happening. After all that travelling we were pretty tired so we ended up getting a kebab and then going to bed.
Saturday morning and we are awoken by a banging on the door. It was Jed’s brother telling us that we were going to be heading down to Jed’s house in 15 minutes. Fifteen minutes to have a shower, get dressed, and get out the door. This is not usually enough for me - half a hour I can cope with but 15 minutes is a stretch. I quickly jumped in the shower and had a fast shave, got dressed, put some contacts in, and ran out the door to find everyone else in the corridor.
Walking was the theme of the weekend. We must have walked miles and miles over the course of the two days. Our first walking adventure of the day was to walk to Jed’s house where we would meet up with the rest of the gang before heading off to the Cricket Club were we were due to watch England A vs Pakistan.

On the way to the Cricket Club we walked through the town centre. James and I spotted a pink chinese-style umbrella which we thought would make Jed look very lady like. James rushed into the shop and quickly bought it from the slightly bemused shop keeper. Jed’s friends then saw a Hawaiian outfit including flowery bra and grass skirt which they also bought. These were presented to Jed and he agreed to wear them once we arrived at the Club.

We spent all of Saturday watching the cricket, drinking beer, eating ice-cream and burgers. It was actually quite enjoyable and I was surprised at how fast the day went by. We appeared to be winning but I am not exactly up on the scoring of Cricket. Jed’s friends managed to get the announcer to tell the croud about Jed and why he was dressed the way he was. Jed’s brother got us to sign a miniture cricket bat with messages of good luck which we presented to Jed later in the day. The sun was out but there was a nice cooling breeze. I ended up getting a sun burnt nose.
In the evening we drank rather a lot at Jed’s house. Jed’s brother had discovered that you can disolve sweets in vodka and had gone on to concoct Werthers Original flavour vodka. His friends had bought him a stripper who was a bit minging but it was funny and everyone had a good laugh. We then took Jed on a pub crawl (managing a total of two pubs before he had to be taken home). Jed did very well and drank an awful lot of alcohol over the weekend. Andi, Jon and I ended up in a trendy bar which had a dance floor downstairs. They were playing some rather funky tunes and we danced the night away before catching a taxi back to the University.

Sunday morning brought with it a very large hang over. It was not good. It was made all the worse after I had had some bacon and sausages. I vowed that I might not drink again. By early afternoon James had recovered enough to drive us back to Bristol. After a long drive, which I slept through, I got home and collapsed into bed.